Cual es El Punto

Algo para reflexionar (originally posted in English 4/19/19 w. diff images)

Una vez después de un fin de semana increíblemente victorioso, y lo que sentí como una “vida” de batallas para obtener la victoria, tengo un momento en que me miré y me di cuenta de que siempre he luchado con todo lo que he tenido y más. Por lo cual, me siento tan agotada (Duh).

Ahora, el agotamiento puede venir de hacer todo lo que puede o puede venir de no hacer nada en absoluto. Dicen que las batallas más grandes se pelean en la mente … y eso hay verdad, pero debo decir que hay una verdad mayor, los verdaderos guerreros luchan a los pies de la guerra.

Mi mayor logro es ver una imagen de mí misma y saber que lo intenté y que luché con todo lo que tenía. Solo así puedo estar satisfecha, y vivir en paz conmigo misma, no necesariamente sabiendo que gané, sabiendo que lo intenté. No vamos a ganar todas las batallas. De hecho vamos a perder muchos.

“Pero si perdemos muchas batallas en el intento, por lo tanto, los estamos ganando todos porque no nos dimos por vencidos y lo intentamos” – Denise

(Lo siento, tuve que citar eso)

¡No olvides que ganas cada vez que lo intentas en la vida!

No siempre fue así, no estoy hablando de nada en lo que no tenga experiencia, sé lo que es estar agotado mentalmente después de pelear una batalla sin mover un pie.

A veces, la vida puede se sentir que se te viene encima una vez y que ya no tienes la oportunidad de respirar y ser tú mismo, y eso puede parecer confuso, lo que puede hacer que pierdas el sentido de ti mismo. Solo recuerda quién eras antes de que esto transcurriera y quién aspirabas a ser, qué sueños tenías y en qué dirección ibas.

¿Cuál podría haber sido la razón por la que se desvió, o cuál podría ser el posible propósito de esta maravillosa demora en su vida en este momento? ¡Encuentra la belleza en el ahora!

A veces es necesario pausar las cosas, es posible que se estés siendo salvado de algo que no conoces o podría haber sido una puerta más abierta para usted.

Me di cuenta que mi rostro significa fuerza interior, mayor propósito, mayor satisfacción y “estoy bien porque mayor es el que camina delante de mí, no tengo miedo de caminar sola porque sé que tengo la compañía de los ángeles que me protegen”. No sé cuántas personas se sienten tan seguras en la vida en este momento, y no estoy tratando de decirte que la vida es todo melocotones y fresas (eso es una mentira loca) Ni siquiera me gustan los melocotones de esa manera.

La vida es dura, las luchas mentales son reales, las batallas emocionales son fuertes, la sensación de vacío puede desgarrar el corazón y el caos de la vida puede hacer que uno se sienta vacío y solitario.

Pero recuerda que mayor es el que está en ti (si lo recibes) estando solo y la soledad no es lo mismo, que puedes controlar tus pensamientos y que eres amado porque “eres más”.

©️2019 Denise Kilby New Hope Life Coaching & Lay Christian Counseling. All rights reserved.

365 Days of New Opportunities

Could we change something this year?

What if I tell you we can?

There are circumstances that we create and turn into situations that mark our lives, many others are circumstances of which we become victims because of family members or people with whom we live create a series of situations and even if we do not want to, we become easy prey of the adversary and without realizing we end up addicted to an abusive and unwanted life pattern.

But with each new day comes the opportunity to start from zero.

You see what I am saying (I truly hope so), every time I say God what is going on with this world why isn’t anyone doing anything for each other anymore? I am hit straight in my face with truth and sleepless nights with walking around looking disconnected with hearth, praying, writing and reading trying to figure things out…ugh—(THAT’S WHY I HAVE YOU, HE SAYS!) this is why I write so much for you this why my passion is bigger than my need for sleep and keeps me up until 1 am and it awakes me at 4am readers, take advantage. Reach out, stop complaining (ask questions later).

Okay now, we make mistakes—again—we live and learn, so can we learn from our mistakes and move on shall we?

Today I want to talk to you about the opportunity that God gives, and the gift that He will give you each of the 365 days of this New Year that is approaching.

Many of the people who fail their New Year’s Resolution (if they) do not have God in their heart as a spiritual guide to centralize them and keep them in the right path end up worse by the end of the year.

Some examples are that: When goals are proposed to get out of depression and to obtain mental closure if they do not seek the right help they tend to fail into a more severe depression, others who fail their diet will gain even more weight, those who say they won’t intake more alcohol if they fail will still take more than they took the previous year and alcoholism will end up consuming them, those who say and propose higher financial goals if they do not do well in their jobs feel even more inept than before (and it is there a lot of times when depression and suicide enters the homes) they let that affect them with their families and in their marriages. The reason for this is because a life without the guidance that keeps us with our feet on the ground is like trying to walk on the clouds with our feet stuck under rocks, instead of with our feet on THE ROCK (which is Christ Jesus) therefore life weighs more instead of feeling lighter.

It ALSO happens that people rise too much to such a level that fame, riches, vanity, and vainglory consumes them, it hurts their soul, and the evil yoke rots on their soul on a spiritual level that The Holy Spirit of God begins to grieve silently (but that’s another theme, for another day or for email).

I don’t know if you want to be one of the bunch, but like I said… I don’t want to be one of bunch!

I was not going to publish this type of “New Year’s Resolution” publication but I read the following today somewhere and it motivated me to write this publication,

“We can not do everything at once, but we can do something at once”

Something AT ONCE-—PACE YOURSELF Don’t you think that if we look at the days as they arrive and we make plans and goals for ourselves and for our lives in order to work on them one day at a time and one goal at a time life will begin to have more lightness in itself… in our daily routine?

God does not give us the 365 days all at the same time, then why do we try to do everything at once, or in many occasions wish for everything in life (that all the good things happened) at the same time?

Do not worry about anything; rather, on every occasion, with prayer and petition, present your requests to God and give thanks. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will take care of your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4: 6-7), worry for one day at a time Matthew 6:34, one goal at a time Philippians 3: 12-14.

God equipped us with a substance called opioids “endogenous” that is produced naturally by the molecules of our brain and helps us deal with pain naturally, these opioids are like those of morphine and heroin. This is why many people become addicted to these substances with such an ease and it becomes so difficult to break that addiction, although it was something given by God to help us protect ourselves and fight pain naturally, it was also duplicated by the enemy of God -Satan to bind the children of God to an addiction and keep them bondage to earthly chains.

When we experience traumas, painful situations, abuse in our childhood and even as adults, when we are in sick and harmful relationships and we see that the cycle continues and does not end even when we want it to end because it hurts us and we no longer want to go to on, this applies to our career paths (our relationship with our employers and coworkers), and this also applies to our church live our congregations and our relationships with our pastors and our leaders. It is healthy to do a self-examination and look to see what can be what is holding us stagnant and is keeping us stuck (perhaps bondage) and that could be what allowing us to continue in that pattern and life cycle.

That is why many times it is necessary to look at our past, our childhood or at the beginning of any relationship or career, be it employment or life path; to find out the root of the problem and uprooted—we have to work from the source and not the branches. Everything starts somewhere. As much as we do not want to, our brains produces this chemical to protect us from painful situations, and often (as it is addictive) we get used to the pain, and the cure (the drug, which is also the antidote) does not come unless we go through the disease (but the cure – the drug) is worse than the disease at times.

We must heal, heal our hearts, go through the pain, let our bodies stop producing that antidote so frequent that is keeping us addicted to creating those circumstances and those situations that keep us stagnate day by day… the Lord has processed us in this year, and we can now say in THIS new Year (and every new day) “come with new strength and heal everything that is blocking and preventing me from seeing the severity of the matter”.

Friends, do not be afraid to seek help. You do not have to wait another day, but also you do not have to do everything at the same time… you do not have to wait another year, but ALSO don’t have to do it alone either. As any addiction you need someone to help you out of it, someone who tells you how to break free, how to break the cycle in which you find yourself (we understand that it is not because you want to) sometimes it’s because you love, and love is good but it often hurts, until you are well you are not in a position to help someone else.

Not everyone falls into that category, others are in need of getting a hold of themselves just for them.

The tests and the processes that you did not completed in this year, you might have to face and retake it next year. Think about how you end this year; analyze how you are going to start this “New Year” (see how I’m speaking in present time?) all you have is now!

Are you ready, are you in shape for what is coming or are you going to wait for a resolution to get fit?

It all starts with the heart!

With love,

—Denise Kilby

©️2018-2019 Denise Kilby Life Coaching & Christian Counseling. All rights reserved.

25 Movies About Mental Health To Watch

Spiritual Health Brings Mental Health & Mental Health Brings Physical Health

I  am a HUGE mental health advocate and I love the fact that Star Moon took the time to gather/search for movies that speak and help in some way create and bring mental health awareness.

Click on the link and visit the blog and pick some movies to watch this weekend! I’ve watch some myself and some others I will be watching this weekend (I cannot wait!). I will make sure to do with family as mental health awareness is something to share and create with others.

25 Movies About Mental Health To Watch

— Read on

As always my friends,

I have your best interest at heart, I read, write, study, and create with you in mind!

—Denise Kilby

©️2018 Denise Kilby New Hope Life Coaching & Lay Christian Counseling. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

Looking Back

As I look back at the stories of my life I realize that I haven’t moved pass them by much. I begin to see me playing a scene of my childhood but from the adult role in my children’s life, yes, at times I see things playing all over again. That’s, when I awake and get the courage to move steady rather than faster but consistently enough to never replay that role again. As parents we have to occasionally glance back to never make the same “mistakes” our parents made and continually look forward to accomplish the goals we want to reach.

There’s no one perfect and being imperfect shouldn’t scare anyone.

We aren’t perfect, even when we think we are. Living to try to impress others can cause us to live in a constant state of fear that will create an environment of stress and makes us physically sick, and mentally unstable—our rules aren’t the most foremost (and that’s okay-what a relief) even when we think they are, our parenting style is not what our kids want all the time (not even what we want-let’s be real) let’s focus on them; let’s focus on their future, on what we want them to remember us by, on what we want them to enjoy and not on “being”the parent we want them to be. Let’s focus on creating a world we can all live in and say this is the people I love despite their color, height, weight, accents, language spoken or distance that could possibly separate us. Let’s live and love with organ that feels like it breaks when is reject it and aches when it’s broken!

Let’s lead the people around us with love and kindness to a better world, to the world we want our love ones to live in, to the world we would had wanted to be part of in our childhood.

                          Everyone defines their own kind of happiness!

Lets change the role & think like kids, or old and innocent enough to never have to fear corrupting anyone, let’s love in such a way that our love sees no wrong on the things we want or the things other people want, love that’s not envious, jealous or holds record of wrong—love that forgives and allows for new opportunities.

Aim higher, glance back from time to time, but look steadily forward with intentions to inspire, encourage, motivate, uplift and never stop dreaming.

Allow yourself to feel, let your senses be alive and be patient with yourself, you get to live this precious life once—learn from your mistakes and don’t feel bad when you fail at trying not to fail again. The key is on trying, in persevering, on being consistent with your soul and knowing that you’re trying to make yourself happy to make the world around you a happier and much livable place to love in.

There’s a light at the end of the tunnel—it won’t be darkness for ever, create, and reconstruct if necessary.

#behuman #parent #daughter #son #mother #father #alive #sibling #beinvolved

—Denise Kilby

©️ 2018 Denise Kilby Life Coaching & Spiritual Counseling ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

We Still Have a Chance

We can definitely go back to the talking era and break free from what’s holding us back.

Talking isn’t part of the solution and conversations are too much of a task to even think of, so let’s just fight and argue instead. “Your opinion isn’t smart (in other words), I make more sense (said by attitude not by logical thinking or the heart) that’s insane, ignorant, stupid, I don’t want to talk about it, I’m done, I don’t like making plans, they never happen, dreams don’t come to pass, I don’t care, there’s nothing else to say, that’s where we end, etc.” are some of the words that spouses use with each other nowadays, those are small examples of things lived and said behind close door.

Those are things that children hear and learn; in most cases on a regular basis, disagreement, inconsistency, confusion, disappointment, lack of hope, negativity, misunderstanding, judgment, resentment and much more. All because we live in an era we’re one or both spouses are stuck to a screen and a world that isn’t real and view the real world (their partner-their spouses) as if they’re not real as well. They expect things that are impossible and reject the unexpected (but possible-and beautiful).

In a world where there’s so much hate, suffering, hunger, arguing, disappointment, loneliness, misunderstanding, disagreement and lastly but not least discrimination, the best thing we can do is be the ultimate hero to those we love. It doesn’t take much to be a great example, 90% of the time it takes a lot less than we can even think of. Our children will live an adult life and handle situations base on what they learned at home, that too is also about 90% right. Stop and think, put your heart to it.

You probably think I don’t have children yet, or I don’t want any, this doesn’t apply to me at all. I am here to remind you that you are someone’s child and that you don’t live in this world alone, you live submerged in the midst of billions of living creatures and breathing individuals that give life to yours.

Be the person your spouse would rather converse with, the listener to your neighbor, be the healer to the sick, the soul patch to the broken, the encourager to discouraged, the planner, the solution, the person to come to in search of hope, the peacemaker, the faithful friend, the lover, the willing, the creator of things at home, be the hero to someone. Don’t wait for a text message, don’t apologize with a heart emoji express yourselves verbal loud and clear, voice your opinions with love. Talk in person, hug be the shoulder to lean on the strong hold, not the know it all!

Now, that might seem hard to do, but where there’s love all things are possible. As long as give as much as we can we are doing as much as possible and that my dear should be very self rewarding. Live aware of what you’re doing, make yourself happy while making others happy, don’t lose grip of yourself while caring for those you’ve been chosen to take care of.

Express yourself with words that blows every millennial’s mind, be the baby boomer that every millennial wants to become and create a world everyone wants to make love in, don’t be afraid to exist and live in the times you were born, remember that love doesn’t have an expiration date.

Remember that to care for other’s you have to be spiritually healthy first, a healthy sweet heart will give out sweet love, but a bitter one will eventually ooze a pungent taste.   —dk

#WeAreEqual #Your’reNotLess #ImNotMore

—Denise Kilby

Ps. “You’re beginning is where & I end where you begin”

Please Know That You Are Not Alone

In moments of despair, desolation, and spiritual brokenness, it can be very hard to see God’s hand working through your problems and we can begin to question a lot of things.

The normal begins to happen and raising thoughts begin to take place in our head:

  1.  Is there even a God? Sounds harsh, but its normal so don’t feel bad.
  2.  Can God even hear me, hello, are you there? Yes, you’re not the only one who feels like you don’t cry loud enough.
  3.  Am I Holy enough to be listened to by a Supernatural God, am I worthy? You begin to question and watch everything you do, you start watching your steps and at the time try to figure out if these is all an illusion. It is a reality—and that is okay.
  4. There’s wicked people down the street with more “blessings” than me “or at least it appears to be”. The struggle is real but so is God and you are not alone, He can hear, He loves you just how you are and He will not allow you to go through what you’re going through if He didn’t have great plans for you.
  5. Why do I have to go through this? Because God has great plans for you, because you are going to do great things in life and you need to go through this process to help others overcome when they are going through theirs.
  6. How much longer will this last? As long as God sees fits, you might just need to show that you have endurance, if you need help and guidance don’t be afraid to seek it. This will last until God is glorified through you, He loves you and this will not kill you, this will make you stronger.

I am here to tell you that “I’ve been there“, and like I always say—“done that and revisit from time to time—wouldn’t be human if didn’t!”

The key is on learning “how to pull out of it on time” without letting it eat the hope and faith out of our heart ♥️! – We have to treat the harvest from when it is STILL a seed, so it can germinate into what we want it to be, make sure to plant it in the right soil, so it get grow the fruits that we want —to then obtain more seeds and eventually reap a harvest of whatever kind we want!

-I hope you’re following me because I am talking about your mental, spiritual and emotional health here-

(If unsure how to this EMAIL ME below where is says “contact”, contact me so I can help and guide you, ask me any questions you may have.

Even Better look what Matthew 6:26 says > Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?

You are nor alone, you are blessed far more than what you can imagine. There is a person in this world who is thinking of you right now and is going out of their way for you. Think outside your head, who could that person might be? And there is another being who loves you so much to use that person to be a blessing to your life, yes, God.

I am blessed to be a blessing to you all, honored to be able to be a life coach to be able to preach the gospel of salvation but most importantly to be able to reach out to be believers and not believers and offer counseling with equal respect regardless their belief system.

I want to encourage you to keep pursuing your dreams and your calling in life, to remind you that life is better when we help others whether through here or in person, and exhort you to seek help when you need it.

As always my beloved with your best interest at heart and mind,

—Denise Kilby #youaremore

Believe Great Things and See Great Things

Our brains can produce and try to sabotage us into believing that we are unable to do certain things that DEEP down we want to do. Deep down within us we know that we have what it takes, but our brain gets filled with so much fear that the negativity becomes bigger than the positivity. Is this resonating so far?

Keep on reading

That is called cognitive dissonance: The fight between two thoughts – a negative one and a positive one.

We have to break free by challenging ourselves:

• Changing the way we think

• Living in the now

• Remembering what we’re all about:

• Make new believes reproduce positive thoughts about yourself

• Reprogram your brain

Let go of that old believe system and find a middle point:

1. “I can lose weight” rather than “I CANNOT LOSE WEIGHT, OR I NEED TO LOSE 30 lbs.” *find a middle meeting point*

2. “I can be successful” rather than – “I NEED TO MAKE 100k A YEAR TO BE SUCCESSFUL, or I’LL BE SUCCESSFUL WHEN I HAVE MY OWN BUSINESS ” *meeting point*

3. “I can help people right from where I am in life”, while I get to where I want to be” rather than – “I NEED TO FINISH DOING THIS IN ORDER TO BE ABLE TO REACH OUT, or I AM NOT EQUIPPED TO HELP ANYONE yet” *meeting point*

WHY are the negative thought in CAPS? Because unfortunately people hold on to negative thoughts easier than to positive ones; that’s how our brain is looking at our negative though – AS MORE , BIGGER,  & LOUDER. You can change that believe system by getting out of your comfort zone!

A comfort zone is not always so comfortable↕️

Those negative thoughts are what the enemy wants you to believe – those positive thoughts are what God wants you to seek from within and place them in your mind on everything you do in live.

Manage your mind, take ownership of what you believe! We all want good things right?

You have to humble yourself and admit that your current believe system is not working (if it really isn’t). Challenge yourself to be what you really want and start believing!

“We go as far as we’re willing to go in our journey, no one has the power on earth to stop us from achieving” – Denise K.

If you believe in God are you actively looking for evidence that there is no God? No right?- you’re showing people what you believe, and you look for evidence that proves that there is a God, you give testimonials about what He has done in your life to make others believe the same, to help others, and have them come to Christ… Help yourself, BELIEVE in yourself!!!

#trust #believe #achieve #hope #faith

You’re amazing, wonderful, powerful, loved, capable, able, equipped!

Now, be blessed and stay in touch 😉

With love always,

Denise Kilby


You don’t need ANYONE on this earth to give you identity, God has already done so! You need yourself to understand who you are and go live the life that was given to you!

A few things:

• Envying your “friends” on social media can lead to depression. That way of thinking will eat your mental strength, you will feel stuck #unable #incapable and live a life to think others are better than you! Thus, they will always look bigger, greater, more successful, happier, prettier…(to mention a few).

Doing that 🔝🔝 is called letting others control you!

• The only person you should compare yourself with is with who you was yesterday (I know you’ve heard that before), and the reason is because it is true.

• You’re world is what you make it (you’ve heard that too) but you will not be able to make the world that you’re worth living in until you know what you want.

• Depression can be as debilitating as physical pain and injure from the inside out as physical pain.

• Let things unfold in your life and you will eventually find your purpose. You will not know who you are until you know what you’re worth.

• Build relationships don’t break them. Don’t reach out to others for personal purposes reach out to others with their best interests at heart and your personal purpose will be met.

• Take time to get to love yourself and you will begin to understand yourself more. **************************************

The goal is to live life happy, and finding your true identity, to get mentally strong and enjoy of good health.

Remember to practice mindfulness, make clear a separation between reality and fantasy.

“The way that you see yourself is the way others will see you…how do you see yourself today?”

You are great!

With love,

Denise Kilby

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